Upswing?

I haven't had much time, nor know the words to not jinx myself. Things have been looking up, dad's doing well. And actually out of my dad's ordeal the very day of my last post something good seems to be happening. Truely because I got brave one night and sent a message on a web site to someone who I'd met before.

We went 'out' once, and have since done a few nights in with movies and dinner, and sporting events. I'm not sure when I've smiled so much, not for a very long time I know that.

Taking things slow and seeing where it goes, but we click very well and have tons in common, and what we don't we are willing to give the others interests a shot. The other night he cooked me dinner, no guy that I've 'dated' has ever done that for me!!!! Can we say BIG DEAL?!?!?!? I told him so and of course he played it down. Tonight he told me I was one hell of a catch!

And the best part is I can be myself around him!!! my jeans and tshirts are fine by him, I don't need makeup and he doesn't care if my hair is still wet from my shower! And my not so neat apartment and my 'monsters' that climb all over him....he loves that part! lol

I don't know, we'll see what happens and enjoy the ride as long as I can!

Rascal Flatts Too Good is True......love the first verse...it fits!

"Too Good Is True"

I guess it's cause and effect
Your heart and mine
The way that we connect
Keeps blowing my mind
There you go again, it never ends
What you do to me

That I have seen the light of day
Love is finally going my way
Is it too good to be true
Give me one more kiss, one more touch
Baby, I just can't get enough of you
This time, too good is true

All of a sudden
I'm not who I used to be
I had my heart locked
But you held the key
And you find a way, everyday
To show me even more

Some people say we're too good to be true
But they don't get to be loved by you


Oh this time, too good is true
Yes it is, yeah

When will it all end?

So my family has been on a roller coaster ride of life with my dad's health for almost 2 years now. The end of July 2006 they life flighted my dad to a big city hospital that specializes in cardiology. He had suffered a massive heart attack, they tried a catheterization, 5 blockages, 3 at 100%. They sent him to the cardiac floor and did emergency bypass surgery the next morning, a saturday. Triple bypass of the blocked arteries. Released, recovered, change in diet and lifestyle.

Fast forward 3 months, to October, leg pain and fatigue, change medication. Next 9 months, random trips to hospital for chest pains and general discomfort. July 07, another heart attack, heart cath, one of the bypasses collapsed, installation of a stent in bypassed artery. Oct 07, chest pains, stress test. Found a narrowing of an artery but drs 'weren't concerned' and sent him home.

That brings us to Monday. Dad gets up, goes to work, gets chest heaviness.....a new symptom he's never had before. Calls mom, drives HIMSELF...yes himself......he's still due a butt kicking for that.... to the ER where they do bloodwork and run an ekg, admit him for observation. Bloodwork and EKG are fine, do second round of both. Leave us hanging til Tuesday. Tuesday drs decide they don't like the new added symptom, going to do a catheterization to check out the problem. Takes us to this morning, they are supposed to transfer from local hospital to city hospital using a transfer company at 11 a.m. ... We stop at local hospital, leave at 10:30 to head down here and get into parking garage and such to meet him when he gets here....12:30 he was just getting loaded in ambulance, not of the transfer company issue. He gets here about 1:20, we've now been sitting in waiting room waiting, call to ask, they let us go back and see him. Procedure scheduled for 2, 3:15 comes and here comes the dr. 100% blockage in a before uneffected artery. Put a large stent in and opened it up.

WHEN IS THIS GONNA END?!?!?!?!? They said his cholestorol is excellent, he's taking plavix to keep blockages from occuring. Whats the deal?


Sorry, just ranting a bit, I found a wireless network here at the hospital, and am passing time til they tell us what room he's in.

Babies

Here's the newest pics of my babies



I don't have much.....lack of sleep and a bouts of dizzyness are my theme for the day, Obee had been doing very well sleeping til last night.....I saw most of every hour of the night......so now that the puppies have been fed, and its almost time to report off, I'm gonna veg and doze.....

DREAMS & ISSUES

Sometimes my brain works overtime when its supposed to be resting. I have never been very in tune to analizing my dreams. And a lot of the time they don't bother me, the last couple I'm remembering lately are bothering me. If they hadn't started BEFORE Obee joined my family I'd just blame it on lack of sleep and my brain going to people that are familiar.

First one was someone that used to be very important to me, BEGGING for help. It disturbed me enough, that I got ahold of him and asked if everything was ok. He now thinks I'm a nut job. I haven't dreamt of him in a long time and I don't know what triggered it.

Then imagine my surprise when he shows up in my dream again last night, with another blast from my past (which came up in conversation yesterday so I'm guessing that's where that came from). I was going to the movies with my coworkers daughters, we pulled in and the old friends car was there. In the dream it was 'oh great who are we going to run into with him'. The girls and I went into go to the movie and 2 of my old loves come out TOGETHER. There were other people that I knew but didn't stick out in my mind. The one of discussion yesterday comes up hello's hugs and the other pretends he doesn't know me. After that of course I woke up, perplexed yet again why these people are showing up in my unconcious mind.

I think it would bother me less if they were random people that I didn't know, rather than people that were an important part of my life at one point.

Then to my issues. . . I have segregated myself from my friends because of my lack of wanting to be social and go to the bar. I went to a birthday party with all of them last night, that I wasn't even aware of til 3 days before...yeah that hurt...and just really felt out of place, and was even worse when I had to leave cause I babysat for a friend last night.

I dunno, I feel out of sorts and down on myself and lonely today. And I WANT to be social today and can't find anyone to do anything. I'm my own worst enemy today.

Momma....

Well I know I will never have children, so I have taken to adopting the 4 legged variety of children....


I have a 2 year old Lhasa apso/miniture poodle mix, who looked like and Ewok when we brought him home, so his name is Wickett.

Just brought home a 5 week old Lhasa apso/shih tzu mix who is much harder to name. He's not reacting to anything, so going with the Star Wars theme, his name is Obee.....

As any proud momma its time to show off pictures!

Wickett today, Wickett when I brought him home, and Obee just today.

Shake ya Tailfeather!

Haven't been here in a while, haven't had much to say. I'm still alive and kickin.....down 8 pounds with just watching portions and cutting out some of my pop intake.

I had some big developments in the massage end, but I'm not quite ready to go too into detail with that yet, but lets say things are looking up!

Tonight is the firehall dance, I've been so antisocial and not wanting to do anything lately, I've been enjoying cabin life *lol* I'm actually LOOKING forward to tonight!

Gonna shake my boot-ay. Lol




MyHotComments

About Me....

Well I was changing my Myspace profile, and I actually got pretty detailed thought I'd share it...I need some help shaving it down....


It was time for a change, new year start out fresh right?

I'm 27 years old, I live in smalltown USA, where if you don't want someone to know, they are SURE to know all about it before your even sure the details yourself....

I work at a medical products plant, I'm a volunteer firefighter for Apollo Hose Co. #2, and I'm a trained massage therapist which I practice in my spare time and am hoping to pursue a little more throughly in 2008.

Work...I work at Cook Vascular full time, in the 'Lead Extraction' department. We make devices that remove Heart lead devices (such as pacemaker leads when the time comes to have them replaced). I've been there over 9 years now, I never in a million years thought I'd be able to say I worked ANYWHERE for 9 years. When I was hired there it was for a year til I went back to school to pursue a career in Computer Science. Well how the times have changed me.

Firehall...I have been a member of the same fire department for 13 years. I joined as a 'junior firefighter' on my 14th birthday. I was pretty much born into the place, I grew up there, as my family has always been involved. I'm a 3rd Generation firefighter after my dad and my grandfather. Currently I will be starting my second year in a 2 year term as Fire Department President, and I am also the appointed Accountability Officer, who's job is to be accountable for everyone on the fire or emergency scene. We are still trying to develop our system, as that position is new as of middle of 2007.


Massage...I'm a trained massage therapist. Finished Massage School in 2004, since then I have taken a couple extra classes to learn some 'energy work' and 'Hot Stone Massage'. Life has kept me busy and I've gotten away from trying to build my own massage business, I'd like to try to work on that a bit more this coming year and see if I can make a go of it!

Aside from all of that, I love my friends and my family, and of course my puppy Wickett! :) And enjoy spending time with them.